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The Single Series: Spitefully Single

  I have an issue with today's "single empowerment". Being empowered and strong-willed while being single isn't a bad thing, but the issue I have with the "single empowerment" is when empowerment turns to spite. I have been very guilty of being spitefully single in different moments of my life. What is spitefully single? It looks different for so many people. "All *insert gender here* suck/treat you bad/can't commit/etc." "I'm single because all *insert gender here* can't love me because my last significant other didn't." Don't get me wrong, it's amazing you know your own self-worth but when you begin to walk through this amazing, yes I said amazing, season of singleness with spite towards the opposite gender you will grow a bitter heart. Bitterness WILL hold you back. 
  Ephesians 4:31-32 "Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." 
  For me personally, I know my spite rooted from hurt and my bitterness grew into hate. The only way I could walk through this season of singleness was if I gave forgiveness to those who hurt me, whether they asked for it or not. Mark 11:25 "And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive your sins."
  How can you find healing and joy throughout this season when you are refusing to find healing for your open wounds? You also can not band-aid your wounds with another relationship. If you were to break your leg you could not run and if you chose to run you would hurt your leg even more, just as expecting a relationship to heal the hurt from an old relationship will cause even more damage. 
  You can not move forward in this dating world until your heart can find healing, the best healing that is found in Christ. No person or thing can build up what was torn down. Do not allow the pain of the past to control your future, especially in this season that is SO perfect to be a season in which you grow and mature. Joy starts with the heart and healing from spite and hatred is found in forgiveness. 
  1 Samuel 16:7 "But the Lord said to Samuel, 'Do not consider his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance but the Lord looks at the heart.'" 

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