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You aren’t always David in the story, sometimes you are Goliath.

I truly believe I am one of the luckiest girls alive. I was raised in a Christian home, sent through private school, and surrounded by love from the most incredible parents, Pastor Dad and Mom. Growing up a PK, my parents did a dang good job at letting me live in a home of grace, corrective love, and freedom from shame. I saw God and Christianity through the acts of a dad who preached the Word and nothing but the Word and through a mom who always would, and still does, tell me to “just be you and forget what anyone else has to say or think about it”. I mean, at 16 they let me dye my hair bubblegum pink; something I clearly have yet to grow out of. I never saw my faith through the eyes of religion, shame, or judgement. Rather, I saw faith through relationship, grace, and the freedom and space to make my faith my own- however that journey needed to happen.  With that being said, I was naive to a world of those who declare Christianity yet spew hate, division, judgement, and so many o...
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God chose you, are you choosing Him?

Hi friends! Your multi-colored hair, coffee drinking, spaz of a friend is back. Life has been an adventure this last year and I find myself back in the town I graduated high school from, living with my parents for the first time in 5 years. I am in a bit of a transitional point in my life, with some time off. So, why not start writing again? As always, I want to be transparent and vulnerable with you. Today's writing is totally prompted by what God has recently been doing in me and I decided to share it with you. You see- I have been chasing a feeling. I have been searching for a way to fill a specific void in my heart. The concept of someone choosing me . Two of my closest friends have heard me sing this song for some time, especially the last few months. I have wanted someone to choose me. I wanted the boy who pursued something with my best friend behind my back, to choose me. I wanted my best friend in that moment, to choose me. I wanted every guy in every failed relat...
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At The Hands Of A Woman - A Response Post

A Christian girl responding to "I'm A Christian Girl And I'm Not A Feminist, Because God Did Not Intend For Women To Be Equals" "It is OK for me to not want to be equivalent with a man." When I saw this article pop up on my Facebook feed back in March, I laughed. This had to be a gag article, right? Some sort of satire published by the Odyssey. (What makes it even better is when I went to re-read it today to write my response, the ad in the middle of the blog was a video titled 'Why Many Christian Girls Remain Single' by a guy. But that is neither here nor there.)  Now this blog is "old news" since it was published in March and I am responding in May, but in all transparency I had to wait to respond (not that it was my job or duty to respond, but I just had so many thoughts and frustrations). I waited to respond because my frustration was going to speak before my heart could. So, I let time pass and I processed it all.  I ha...
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Hidden Not Forgotten

Exodus 2:2 "The woman became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She saw that he was a special baby and kept him hidden for three months." * Back story to this verse- Pharaoh wanted all Hebrew baby boys killed so they couldn't grow up and overthrow him but then when Moses was born, his mother found a way to protect him. Then comes the classic story of being put in the river and taken in by the Pharoh's daughter.* If I am vulnerable, there have been many times, even recently, where I have cried out to God and said, "You forgot me." Whether it was being passed up for the promotion, being rejected by someone, or simply just being overlooked in general. I have gone through seasons where I feel like I am constantly being overlooked and there have been many conversations between God and I where I have bitterly cried at the thought that the very God who created me, forgot about me. Maybe I am not alone in this thinking. Maybe some of you have or are currently ...
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The Single Girl Series: Okay, But When?

One of the "go-to" responses people give to me on singleness is: "You have to find the place and walk in your purpose before you find your person ." I rolled my eyes every time. That's not how I wanted it to happen. I wanted to find my person three years ago while I was still in beauty school in Los Angeles, running from the call of ministry. I remember praying one night and feeling deep in my soul my person did not live in L.A. which that's okay, I just had to wait for him to move there, right? Little did I know God was going to move me . It was as if after every milestone in my life I thought, "Okay this is it! This was the defining moment for me to find my person." But after dropping out of school, moving to a whole new city, quitting a part time job and being promoted within the best job ever, being financially stable, and finally- being ordained as a pastor- I came to realize something, it's not just about the place and the purpose, b...
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The Single Girl Series: My Sister Was Right

My sister lives across the world with a 10 hour time difference and a newborn baby. One night I couldn't take it anymore and I sent her a long text message asking her a series of "why" questions. Why was I still single? Why wasn't it my turn? Why do people keep walking out of my life? Why is it that I have accomplished all I have wanted to at this age but I have no one to share it with? Why wasn't the desire of my heart being met? Just, why? I knew my sister didn't know the answer to any of those questions- but I did definitely hope the Lord would give her some insight and she could just give me answers. Instead of answers, she said to me, "My prayer is that you see the Lord as your satisfaction." Jennaya. Not what I wanted to hear. I wrestled with that for so long because to me, I knew that I was in such a healthy place with my relationship with God. I had never been so deeply in love with the Lord and emotionally and mentally I was in a gre...
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Guard Your Heart- But Don't Build Walls

I think the quickest advice anyone ever gives when it comes to relationships- whether it be friendships, dating relationships, or business partnerships- is to "guard your heart". If I had a dollar for every time someone told me to "guard my heart" I would have enough money to hire Kylie Jenner's very attractive personal body guard. I get it..  Proverbs 4:23  "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." The problem with hearing "guard your heart" over and over again- no one told me what that meant so I began to interpret it as "build walls." I don't blame anyone for how I interpreted their advice but I feel as though many of us have begun to interpret protecting our heart as building walls up. So, what does it really mean to guard your heart- and how do we do it? Guard : (v) watch over in order to protect or control Okay- I think most of us know what "guard" means - but it's pretty ...
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